We Cannot All Be Feminists – Nel Ibuola

Yegazie has a video on YouTube, I watched it last weekend. As the video began, she emphasized it was no response to another video of same title, that seemed to have been released earlier by another user on the same website.
I had thought then that the disclaimer was needless, until I began to work on this writing and I see how much I am compelled, mostly by social nobility, to dissociate this work from that of Chimamanda- which I believe you probably have read or heard. Stories and words are powerful and they belong to nobody.


The intention to uphold a universal equity between genders is beautiful and admirable, so I like feminism and think we all should. We all should LIKE feminism.
By our civilization, we have come to understand better the position of sexes; that I can write not because I am a man, that I can cook well not because I am a woman. Our function and positions are not defined from or by our sexes, we should understand. We cannot and must not attempt to stretch further any idea that perceives a person is better by only the chance of their gender, something they entirely had no choice over, we should understand.
A man is a man not because the penis is superior to the vagina, no, by no definition is a penis even close to as beautiful and potentially valuable as a vagina is. And sure, testosterones, baritone and muscle bulks dont make him almighty, they are all easily matched by Estrogens, alto and fatty curves. A woman is the most beautiful of creatures, we should not argue this, her gait and gaze glisten. No human or its form is more superior than another simply by their gender. If the topic of superiority should come up in a future, I’d tell you intelligence, forbearance and hardwork always dwarfs gender. Every human is equal, unique and different, that is the idea feminism stands for.
I believe entirely in the grand agenda of feminism, but I have a problem with ‘new-age feminists’ . I do not celebrate them, I should, but I cannot. I cannot celebrate people who have corrupted an idea so ingenious and noble as feminism. Since 1895, when the words were first inked, several females have risen to attempt to claim its glory, each striving to both redefine and possess it. A lot of beautiful names with glorious memories have worked to make the idea even more noble and genuine, Adrienne Rich has done more for feminism than Thomas Edison for electricity, and her papers provoke proper reasoning. But I cannot say same of French Feminist Valeri Jean Solanas, greatly applauded as a “heroine”, “woman-right champion” and even termed by Florynce Kennedy as the “most important spokeswoman of the feminist movement”. Valeri continuously and popularly said “To call a man an animal is to flatter him, he is a machine,  a walking dildo… And deep down, every man knows he is a worthless piece of shit”. Those were the moment Feminists began to decay in perspective and the new-age feminists emerged. A theory that purely strived for equity was corrupted.
Feminists from then began mostly to thirst for gender-superiority, to become same as the monster they repelled. It saw imbalance in everything and craved for an abolishment, the way people sit in buses, how they hold cellphones, road signs and name initials. Each time it spots these imbalance, it doesnt strive for a balance, it mostly will request the same imbalance is repeated in its favour. Put the woman to the right, Place her head upwards and his also downwards, O that colour isnt woman friendly, its all neutral.
Facebook recently changed its icons and sure I noticed, but I hadnt noticed the details responsive to New-age Feminists demand, the friend request icon. In the old icon, a silhouette of a man was in front and to the left, his shoulders etched into the woman, feminists were uncomfortable with this, I was too. So following several debates and papers, facebook was pressured to make new icons that placed the woman in front and to the left, as large as the man and her shoulder etched into him. That wasnt equity if he now stand behind her, and under the shadows of her shoulder, thats superiority.
In the earlier parts of this work, I had made straight as an arrow that I do not support, and is discomforted by ideas that project superiority based on gender or equally flimsy details, by extension now, I am discomforted by feminists and cannot respect them. A movement that now foster gender hatred and superiority is not to be celebrated, even in the most dysfunctional community.
Feminist are not an equity conscious group, they have emerged as a hate group, and soon Mothers will begin to despise their sons, only for their ‘unfortunate’ masculinity.
Clearly, we cannot all belong to a movement that breeds gender hatred.
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At the end of the video, Yegazie turned heads down, her Afro concealed her trunk almost entirely, her svelte upper limbs sparce on each side, then she said “Mehn, I’m looking buff mehn. I’m looking buff”.
Hilarious self-obsession, just like feminism.

Nel Ibuola writes, studies and lives in Jos. He is currently working on his second blog-novel which you can read here. This is one of the works in his building compendium – Shrinks and Madmen.
He is on Twitter and Instagram as @n_ibuola